Articles peppering me with the theme of kids not getting enough sleep are coming at me from all directions as of late. There is a consensus across the country that kids, especially adolescents, need more snooze time. Anyone who has been a teenager or lived in close proximity to one already knows this sans all of the research and hype. We know it to be true, but continue to schedule school start times that are more suitable for senior citizens than youth citizens. In work, in school, and in fun it seems like you just can't get away from it, morning people rule
I am not a morning person. In fact, I am probably as difficult to rouse now as I ever was when I was a teenager. My father is in his 70s and he is still a night owl with a strong aversion to mornings. It is likely that I am not going to change anytime soon no matter how desperately I would like to re-set my biological clock in order to fit in and be popular with those pesky early risers.
When I see all of this information regarding adolescents and sleep I know that for some of them at least, the inability to retire early and rise early will not change. So, should they just struggle through this stage of their lives tired as hell and try to get used to it, or should the world change and try and give them a break before real life after high school sets in?
Frankly, I can see both sides. Being forced to rise early certainly did not change me into an early riser. As an adult it was the job where I had to arrive at 7:00am each day that I used the most sick days. I didn't come home from that job and get things done either, I came home and slept. Sometimes I tried to go to bed early, nothing helped, I felt sick until my schedule changed. It is the same thing with trying to get up early to exercise, my muscles are so stiff and sore that I need to stretch for at least an hour and ingest a large cup of caffeine before hitting the gym.
I don't know what the answer is, but I do know that confirmed night owls such as myself certainly don't get much respect. If I over sleep it is usually because I was up late the night before doing something productive and not due to laziness for which I have sometimes been accused. I might add that going to bed earlier does not help, I still resist getting up. The sad fact is that my children are the same way. My husband is a night owl like me, so how could we expect anything different from our offspring?
More than likely my children will grow up to encounter the same problems that I have, the world is run by morning people who try and make us night owls feel lazy and unproductive because we are not giddy with the sunrise. When I think about adolescents and those of us who prefer the evening to the early morning hours, I think that what the world needs is less discrimination and more tolerance for all sleep types . The world is more colorful and interesting when we don't all arise at the break of day.
Showing posts with label Personal Message. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal Message. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Sunday, June 20, 2010
On Getting Kicked Out....
Last night I went to see the Psychedelic Furs with my husband and a small group of friends. It was a great show and the band really sounds no different than they did in their heyday in the 1980's. Everything went fine until I got kicked out of the venue. I would love to know what I did to get kicked out, but I don't, and it looks like I probably never will and this annoys me greatly because I am obsessive and want to know the reason behind the injustice. Did I have too much to drink? Yes. But, I was done drinking and planning to meet my husband up near the stage in order to get a better view of the band.
Before meeting him, I had a quick stop-off to the bathroom. I was in the process of washing my hands in the bathroom sink when a female employee asked me to step out with her and I bewilderingly obliged. It looked like we were headed to the door and I began to feel a bit panicked and in my panic I stopped on the stairs to ask why we were going outside. At this point I saw a friend of mine from our group and frantically waved her over. She came and two male bouncers told her that I needed to get off of the stairs and that they had told me to get off of the stairs and number of times and I wouldn't. "Huh?" I was only on the stairs because I had been asked to leave the bathroom, without time to dry my hands I might add, and I seriously wanted to know what was going on. As the bouncers were threatening to "carry me out" I went out with my friend and she said that she would go and find my husband.
Now I am out on the street in front of the venue. Fortunately I could still hear the music and even see the band. The bouncer than proceeds to tell me that I need to leave and that he will call a cab for me. Again, "Huh? What the hell!" I have a designated driver, my husband, and I tell him that my friend is in the process of trying to locate him. By the time he comes I am seriously angry and belligerent. The bouncer then tells my husband that he won't answer any of my questions because I am being belligerent. I told myself that I would not swear at the bouncer and would not make any physical or verbal threats and I did not. The bouncer didn't want me there, but I had done nothing wrong and I was planning to "watch" the rest of the show come hell or high water. As I was not threatening in any way it would have had to be the bouncer who needed to make to first move and quite frankly I don't think that would look too great.
My husband went back inside for a bit and then came out to stand on the sidewalk with me which was nice, at least I had company. The bouncer remained quite upset that I wouldn't leave and kept barking things at me like "step away from the door" even though it was an exit, I wasn't in front of it, and no one was leaving. It seemeded as though these paper doll power plays on the part of the bouncer were misguided attempts to goad me into reacting. Whatever, by then I had lost interest and just decided to take what I could get from this evening gone south.
The venue was the Sodo Showbox in Seattle near the Mariners Stadium. I think that the bouncers must have been bored that evening. There were a number of them milling about on the sidewalk and no other member of the public was outside, not even smokers, except for me. Maybe they were lacking in excitement. I would still love to know why I was singled out though and why I was approached in the bathroom, that really boggles my mind. All in all a really bizarre evening and not the kind that I hope to repeat anytime soon.
Before meeting him, I had a quick stop-off to the bathroom. I was in the process of washing my hands in the bathroom sink when a female employee asked me to step out with her and I bewilderingly obliged. It looked like we were headed to the door and I began to feel a bit panicked and in my panic I stopped on the stairs to ask why we were going outside. At this point I saw a friend of mine from our group and frantically waved her over. She came and two male bouncers told her that I needed to get off of the stairs and that they had told me to get off of the stairs and number of times and I wouldn't. "Huh?" I was only on the stairs because I had been asked to leave the bathroom, without time to dry my hands I might add, and I seriously wanted to know what was going on. As the bouncers were threatening to "carry me out" I went out with my friend and she said that she would go and find my husband.
Now I am out on the street in front of the venue. Fortunately I could still hear the music and even see the band. The bouncer than proceeds to tell me that I need to leave and that he will call a cab for me. Again, "Huh? What the hell!" I have a designated driver, my husband, and I tell him that my friend is in the process of trying to locate him. By the time he comes I am seriously angry and belligerent. The bouncer then tells my husband that he won't answer any of my questions because I am being belligerent. I told myself that I would not swear at the bouncer and would not make any physical or verbal threats and I did not. The bouncer didn't want me there, but I had done nothing wrong and I was planning to "watch" the rest of the show come hell or high water. As I was not threatening in any way it would have had to be the bouncer who needed to make to first move and quite frankly I don't think that would look too great.
My husband went back inside for a bit and then came out to stand on the sidewalk with me which was nice, at least I had company. The bouncer remained quite upset that I wouldn't leave and kept barking things at me like "step away from the door" even though it was an exit, I wasn't in front of it, and no one was leaving. It seemeded as though these paper doll power plays on the part of the bouncer were misguided attempts to goad me into reacting. Whatever, by then I had lost interest and just decided to take what I could get from this evening gone south.
The venue was the Sodo Showbox in Seattle near the Mariners Stadium. I think that the bouncers must have been bored that evening. There were a number of them milling about on the sidewalk and no other member of the public was outside, not even smokers, except for me. Maybe they were lacking in excitement. I would still love to know why I was singled out though and why I was approached in the bathroom, that really boggles my mind. All in all a really bizarre evening and not the kind that I hope to repeat anytime soon.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Keeping a Happy Outlook
The kids have been on spring break this week and I have actually had some time to read the paper. Often reading the paper can be a real downer for me, it always seems that most of the news is so negative. I have decided to focus on the positive this week and here are a few positive things that I have learned while reading the news:
1) Over 7,000 acres along the Hoh River in the Olympic Rain Forest have been preserved as wilderness, a place where the trees will be allowed to grow "huge," much like other areas in the rain forest that haven't been logged. This will ensure a local wilderness and waterway for future generations.
2) A crusty ex-serviceman and ex-child crimes detective legally adopted a former victim. The child is now 19 years of age and is blind, quadriplegic, and severely brain-damaged from abuse sustained at the hands of his mother's boyfriend when he was a toddler. This family-less detective was planning to use his retirement funds to travel. He had re-connected with this boy as a teenager, saw how he never got better, forged a bond with him, and decided to legally become his parent instead of travelling the globe alone.
3) A cop went undercover, posing as a pedophile father of two daughters ages 11 and 13. He developed an on-line relationship with the pedophile he was investigating and managed to secure enough evidence to put this guy away for life. People like to say that the Internet is the new playground for pedophiles and I think that is true. It is a real joy to see it working against them.
Tucked in between the real big stories are always those little events, a child promoting a charity, people lost to one another reconnecting, a new service invented by someone creative. If I really try to be less of a cynic, the positive news is out there, it just sometimes seems to get lost in all of the badness of the world.
1) Over 7,000 acres along the Hoh River in the Olympic Rain Forest have been preserved as wilderness, a place where the trees will be allowed to grow "huge," much like other areas in the rain forest that haven't been logged. This will ensure a local wilderness and waterway for future generations.
2) A crusty ex-serviceman and ex-child crimes detective legally adopted a former victim. The child is now 19 years of age and is blind, quadriplegic, and severely brain-damaged from abuse sustained at the hands of his mother's boyfriend when he was a toddler. This family-less detective was planning to use his retirement funds to travel. He had re-connected with this boy as a teenager, saw how he never got better, forged a bond with him, and decided to legally become his parent instead of travelling the globe alone.
3) A cop went undercover, posing as a pedophile father of two daughters ages 11 and 13. He developed an on-line relationship with the pedophile he was investigating and managed to secure enough evidence to put this guy away for life. People like to say that the Internet is the new playground for pedophiles and I think that is true. It is a real joy to see it working against them.
Tucked in between the real big stories are always those little events, a child promoting a charity, people lost to one another reconnecting, a new service invented by someone creative. If I really try to be less of a cynic, the positive news is out there, it just sometimes seems to get lost in all of the badness of the world.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Taking on Big Problems
I want to thank fellow blogger Snowflake for her latest post on how no one has the market cornered on problems. I will be the first to admit that it takes me a while to actually talk about my problems unless they are relatively minor and have to do with some day-to-day complaint. Usually my husband is an easy target, especially when he is acting like my supposedly non-existent fourth child, but so I digress. This last year has been a challenging one in our community and 2010, in many ways, does not seem to be off to a better start for some. In and amidst all of these goings on, we somehow manage to stay on course. Nothing big has plagued our family, thank God and I really have more than my share to be thankful for. It does not mean that I do not have problems. Just because they aren't big doesn't mean that they aren't there. I think that it is easy in the midst of big problems to talk about them with people that you might feel are not experiencing this depth of problem themselves. Gee, I hope that made sense. Probably this is a good idea since talking about them with someone who has the similar depth of problems may lead to wallowing and one upmanship and could just get downright uncomfortable.
This last year has taught me much about myself and how I handle and react to problems and stress in the lives of others. Often I can be a very good listener and I hope an understanding one, because I have learned how to take care of me. If I forget what I need I can quickly feel overburdened. I used to think that I could actually help people solve their problems and help them find a plan. In this last year, many of the problems that I have faced with friends have been so monumentally big and so impossible to solve that I have learned that one doesn't always need a plan. In fact, a plan might often not be forthcoming for months or even years in some cases.
If there is one thing that I want to be remembered for at the end of my life it is that I was a good friend. Sometimes I realize that I am not and no one ever is, there are limitations. I can listen, I can support, I don't need to internalize everything, I can take a breather and still be a good friend. This is the best that I can offer and in the end, most of the time, it is probably enough.
This last year has taught me much about myself and how I handle and react to problems and stress in the lives of others. Often I can be a very good listener and I hope an understanding one, because I have learned how to take care of me. If I forget what I need I can quickly feel overburdened. I used to think that I could actually help people solve their problems and help them find a plan. In this last year, many of the problems that I have faced with friends have been so monumentally big and so impossible to solve that I have learned that one doesn't always need a plan. In fact, a plan might often not be forthcoming for months or even years in some cases.
If there is one thing that I want to be remembered for at the end of my life it is that I was a good friend. Sometimes I realize that I am not and no one ever is, there are limitations. I can listen, I can support, I don't need to internalize everything, I can take a breather and still be a good friend. This is the best that I can offer and in the end, most of the time, it is probably enough.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Feeling Grown Up
Although I am chronologically an adult, often I feel like an older adolescent or very young adult at heart. When I look in the mirror I realize that this is not true. Sometimes after pausing to look at myself closely, I have to ask myself the inevitable, self-examining question that I am sure most adults ask of themselves at least once in a lifetime, "What have I done with my life?'
Today I did a very grown up thing and bought a ticket to a rather large fundraising luncheon to take place here in my small home city next month. The organization, PACE, is raising funds to build a large performing arts center here where I live. Initially I decided to purchase a ticket and go because a friend of mine is hosting a table and invited me.
Then I had another one of those moments in the mirror and realized that maybe I should find out more about this organization and see if I might want to get involved. It turns out that I could really get behind this organization. When I was younger, I always thought that I would be more of a hands-on person, doing the labor with the people so to speak. Now I am thinking that maybe I might be a bit more interested in getting involved from the fundraising end and getting experience in a more adult role. Maybe...at some point I might actually even join a board.
Today I did a very grown up thing and bought a ticket to a rather large fundraising luncheon to take place here in my small home city next month. The organization, PACE, is raising funds to build a large performing arts center here where I live. Initially I decided to purchase a ticket and go because a friend of mine is hosting a table and invited me.
Then I had another one of those moments in the mirror and realized that maybe I should find out more about this organization and see if I might want to get involved. It turns out that I could really get behind this organization. When I was younger, I always thought that I would be more of a hands-on person, doing the labor with the people so to speak. Now I am thinking that maybe I might be a bit more interested in getting involved from the fundraising end and getting experience in a more adult role. Maybe...at some point I might actually even join a board.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Health Care Alarm Bells
Speaking as the daughter of a breast cancer survivor, I know that I am not the only woman watching the current debate regarding women's health with growing concern. Less than a century ago, there truly was no specialized health care for women. All of the medical research was done on men. We have come a long way in the screening and care of women's health concerns. Now I feel like congress and some medical professionals want to turn back the hands of time.
Breast cancer screening, pap smears, and other "women centered" health tests do save lives. I know more than a handful of people in my age group (early 40's) who have caught their cancer early thanks to these invaluable tools. I can see the writing on the wall when it comes to coverage. Those "great minds" in charge of our well-being will determine that women only need these tests every few years or so and insurance companies will use that as an excuse to curtail assessment for women and cut it further. I believe that all of these cuts are motivated purely by an effort to save money. Most cancer experts that I have heard interviewed do not agree with these changes. When I look at this issue, I see those that are for the archaic changes to women's health care are the same ones that can save money when it comes to denying women coverage.
It has only been within the last few decades that women in general have had the knowledge and coverage to get these life-saving tests. Yes, women's health care certainly seems to moving back into the middle ages and more women are not going to be able to get treatment and die as a result of it and we will have the government of "change" to thank.
Breast cancer screening, pap smears, and other "women centered" health tests do save lives. I know more than a handful of people in my age group (early 40's) who have caught their cancer early thanks to these invaluable tools. I can see the writing on the wall when it comes to coverage. Those "great minds" in charge of our well-being will determine that women only need these tests every few years or so and insurance companies will use that as an excuse to curtail assessment for women and cut it further. I believe that all of these cuts are motivated purely by an effort to save money. Most cancer experts that I have heard interviewed do not agree with these changes. When I look at this issue, I see those that are for the archaic changes to women's health care are the same ones that can save money when it comes to denying women coverage.
It has only been within the last few decades that women in general have had the knowledge and coverage to get these life-saving tests. Yes, women's health care certainly seems to moving back into the middle ages and more women are not going to be able to get treatment and die as a result of it and we will have the government of "change" to thank.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
I Wish You Enough
I never really thought that I'd spend as much time in airports as I do. I don't know why. I always wanted to be famous and that would mean lots of travel. But I'm not famous, yet I do see more than my share of airports. I love them and I hate them. I love them because of the people I get to watch. But they are also the same reason why I hate airports. It all comes down to "hello" and "goodbye.
I must have mentioned this a few times while writing my stories for you. I have great difficulties with saying goodbye. Even as I write this I am experiencing that pounding sensation in my heart. If I am watching such a scene in a movie I am affected so much that I need to sit up and take a few deep breaths. So when faced with a challenge in my life I have been known to go to our local airport and watch people say goodbye. I figure nothing that is happening to me at the time could be as bad as having to say goodbye.
Watching people cling to each other, crying, and holding each other in that last embrace makes me appreciate what I have even more. Seeing them finally pull apart, extending their arms until the tips of their fingers are the last to let go, is an image that stays forefront in my mind throughout the day.
On one of my recent business trips, when I arrived at the counter to check in, the woman said, "How are you today?" I replied, "I am missing my wife already and I haven't even said goodbye."She then looked at my ticket and began to ask, "How long will you...Oh, my God. You will only be gone three days!" We all laughed. My problem was I still had to say goodbye. But I learn from goodbye moments, too.
Recently I overheard a father and daughter in their last moments together. They had announced her departure and standing near the security gate, they hugged and he said, "I love you. I wish you enough." She in turn said, "Daddy, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Daddy."They kissed and she left.
He walked over toward the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see he wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on his privacy, but he welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say goodbye to someone knowing it would be forever?" "Yes, I have," I replied. Saying that brought back memories I had of expressing my love and appreciation for all my Dad had done for me. Recognizing that his days were limited, I took the time to tell him face to face how much he meant to me. So I knew what this man experiencing.
"Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever goodbye?" I asked."I am old and she lives much too far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is, the next trip back would be for my funeral," he said.
"When you were saying goodbye I heard you say, "I wish you enough." May I ask what that means?"He began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." He paused for a moment and looking up as if trying to remember it in detail, he smiled even more. "When we said 'I wish you enough,' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them," he continued and then turning toward me he shared the following as if he were reciting it from memory.
* I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
* I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
* I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
* I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
* I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
* I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
* I wish enough hello's to get you through the final goodbye.
He then began to sob and walked away.
My friends, I wish you enough!
--- Copyright © 2001 Bob Parks
I must have mentioned this a few times while writing my stories for you. I have great difficulties with saying goodbye. Even as I write this I am experiencing that pounding sensation in my heart. If I am watching such a scene in a movie I am affected so much that I need to sit up and take a few deep breaths. So when faced with a challenge in my life I have been known to go to our local airport and watch people say goodbye. I figure nothing that is happening to me at the time could be as bad as having to say goodbye.
Watching people cling to each other, crying, and holding each other in that last embrace makes me appreciate what I have even more. Seeing them finally pull apart, extending their arms until the tips of their fingers are the last to let go, is an image that stays forefront in my mind throughout the day.
On one of my recent business trips, when I arrived at the counter to check in, the woman said, "How are you today?" I replied, "I am missing my wife already and I haven't even said goodbye."She then looked at my ticket and began to ask, "How long will you...Oh, my God. You will only be gone three days!" We all laughed. My problem was I still had to say goodbye. But I learn from goodbye moments, too.
Recently I overheard a father and daughter in their last moments together. They had announced her departure and standing near the security gate, they hugged and he said, "I love you. I wish you enough." She in turn said, "Daddy, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Daddy."They kissed and she left.
He walked over toward the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see he wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on his privacy, but he welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say goodbye to someone knowing it would be forever?" "Yes, I have," I replied. Saying that brought back memories I had of expressing my love and appreciation for all my Dad had done for me. Recognizing that his days were limited, I took the time to tell him face to face how much he meant to me. So I knew what this man experiencing.
"Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever goodbye?" I asked."I am old and she lives much too far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is, the next trip back would be for my funeral," he said.
"When you were saying goodbye I heard you say, "I wish you enough." May I ask what that means?"He began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." He paused for a moment and looking up as if trying to remember it in detail, he smiled even more. "When we said 'I wish you enough,' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them," he continued and then turning toward me he shared the following as if he were reciting it from memory.
* I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
* I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
* I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
* I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
* I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
* I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
* I wish enough hello's to get you through the final goodbye.
He then began to sob and walked away.
My friends, I wish you enough!
--- Copyright © 2001 Bob Parks
Monday, July 27, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)