Saturday, September 6, 2008

Beards and Blogging

Today I am going to blog about beards and why I hate them. I don't really like mustaches either and the beard/mustache combination really puts me over the edge. What got me thinking this way? It was a movie that I saw last night called "The Last Waltz." It was a cinemagraphic version of The Band's last concert. Fantastic guest stars to be sure! The year was 1976 and everyone looked like Grizzly Adams. Some even looked a bit like the mad professor. The music was great, the facial hair, hideous.

Now, onto why I don't like beards. I don't like them because I don't see how they can be clean. It seems like getting near a beard would be a good way to experience secondhand someones spittle or leftover food particles. The man doesn't have to be metrosexual to be sexy, but there is really nothing sexy about a beard. I have heard women say that they like the way a beard feels. I guess you could get this same effect by rubbing a Brillo pad on your face and it would be more sanitary. Beards may be sexy on a man who has spent a number of weeks or months in the out-of-doors getting physical and back to nature. It seems like the shaving of the beard upon introduction back into civilization should accompany the much needed shower.

I have friends who have beards and I do think that there is a certain kind of personality that carries a beard well. I mean it just seems to "go" with the man. No problem, I just don't want to have to get near it. My husband grew a beard once. It was straggly and stringy and it did not go with his personality. I told him that it didn't look good on him. It wasn't even a "healthy" beard. It took one of our friends quite innocently asking if he had joined the urban Taliban (the year was 2002) for him to go home and immediately shave it off. He left the mustache. This did not look good either. A friend of ours told him that he looked like a retired porn star. I don't know if it was the retired part or the porn star part, but he went home and shaved that off as well. My husband may not always have the best of taste. I am thankful for outspoken friends who do.

No comments: